I think my clock and I are going to break up. There�s a lot to be said for accountability, and that�s just a virtue about which my clock no longer seems to care! It isn�t like I�ve been mistreating it, either. I bought it for a song in London (well, practically -- a song and �5 or so, but you could tell it was the song that really won the clerk over)(see, I�ve worked up this rendition of "Hey, Look Me Over" and I don�t mean to brag, but it�s really pretty amazing) and I really didn�t plan on keeping it or anything, but then it was just so good I had to take it back to the States with me!
Of course, that was long, long ago. Yesterday it failed to wake me up on time, as you know (although some might accuse me of having "turned it off", which I suppose, if you want to be extremely literal-minded about it, is true), and today it woke me up a blasted half-hour early. And I mean, okay, so I had it set for 7:30 and it went off as soon as the clock struck 7:30�but the clock struck 7:30 at 7:00, is what I�m saying.
How did that happen? I sure didn�t set the clock back thirty minutes! Unless maybe I did it yesterday morning when I was trying to reset the alarm�oops! Shit! I mean�damn. Okay, fine. So my alarm did go off yesterday, are you satisfied? It went off the first time. I went to reset it, so I could get a little more shuteye, and it just never went off again, which is how I overslept and got cake. Maybe when I reset it, I accidentally did something funky (I am wont to be funky at 7:30 in the morning) and accidentally screwed with the time display. Lucky for me I set it back rather than forward. Although if I�d set it forward, who knows? I might be eating cake right now.
So you see? The magic has gone out of our relationship. I change his batteries, I always check him before going to bed�maybe not closely enough, as history seems to have shown, but I do. And this is how he thanks me. What an ingrate! That�s the last time I don�t blame him for waking me up in the morning, I tell you!
I guess if I�m going to be honest, though, it was sort of a good thing that I got woken up early this morning, because I was having really creepy nightmares. There was this serial killer on the loose, and I was in this group of people whom the killer was using as his primary target pool. There was a cop and a greaser and some chick on roller skates�I remember the chick on roller skates because she had a real hard time getting through the tennis courts, what with all the industrial plastic wrap that had been stretched over it. And then, right before I woke up, we were diving in the ocean where this treasure had been dropped overboard, but the guy that dove only found a rusted chain, which was 200 feet down, and now that I think about it, why the hell didn�t he have a scuba tank on, or at least a pair of freaking goggles? Anyway, he only found a chain, and everyone was like, "That�s not treasure! Look harder!" and I�m all, "He doesn�t even have goggles on, people, cut him some slack!" and then I was like, "Holy crap, if he found a chain, that means there�s something down there!"
And then they were going to make me go down to check it out, like no thank you, I�ll just ask this big huge SHARK with the GAPING BLOODY JAWS to have a look-see and tell me if he finds anything! Eesh. Gives me the creeps just thinking about it.
So I guess I really kind of owe my clock a debt of gratitude. And I think I�ve fixed the problem, too, so maybe I should just wait and see if things get better. Yeah, maybe I�ll do that.
But one more screw up and I�m going to make time fly, if you know what I mean.
Someone Got Here By Searching For: how nintendo got me fired And: angelface fucked I�m Watching: Tim Burton�s Planet of the Apes. Yeah. Planet of Crap is more like it. And: CSI. Is it just me, or did Catherine almost get her freak on?