� Memoirs of an Evil Genius �
Conquering the World, One Martini at a Time

� Part Two: Miranda �
12:49 p.m., 2004-02-09

Miranda Walters skipped across the snow-blanketed asphalt of the parking lot, heedless of her mother�s constant admonishments to slow down. Her brown eyes sparkled, fascinated by the sight of the ground rushing towards and away from her shiny pink boots � new that winter � as she hopped in the snow. Her mittens were new as well, and she took great pleasure in them, gesticulating extravagantly so as to see them from every possible angle.

There was a wide wooden bridge that spanned the river, connecting one side of the park to the other. It boasted two perplexing ridges, which, her mother had explained, were there to show her where it was safe to walk. The space between the ridges was for cars, while the other side was for people. This was a restriction far too unimaginative for a six-year-old, and so Miranda jumped up on the leftmost ridge and used it as a balance beam.

She watched her feet carefully, so as not to slip, and placed one boot in front of the other, heel to toe. She began to quicken her pace, though, enjoying her mother�s exasperation and wishing to stay well ahead of her and her baby brother. She was really picking up speed by the time she reached the middle of the bridge, but something off to her right, glinting in the afternoon sun, caught her eye.

Miranda leapt off the balance beam, landing in the center of the bridge with both feet, making a very satisfactory thud that made the whole structure vibrate. She stooped, and out of the snow she pulled a small golden locket in the shape of a heart. For a moment, she breathlessly marveled at the pretty thing, but then, fearing that perhaps her mother wouldn�t let her keep it, she quickly stuffed it into her pocket and ran the remaining length of the bridge, the booming echoes of her footsteps ringing out behind her.

Her mother caught up with her on the other side, and Miranda was scolded for running off, but the girl barely listened, thinking about her treasure. Instead, when her mother�s speech came to a close, she turned again and skipped off down the footpath, wondering how her new necklace would look with her new boots. Being so lost in thought, Miranda did not notice a second pair of boots right in front of her until moments before she collided with their decidedly adult owner.

The little girl stared up in shock at the elderly woman standing above her, who, it seemed, had just materialized out of thin air. The old woman winked at Miranda, and then stepped around her, continuing down the path in the direction from which the girl had just come. Miranda�s mother attempted to apologize for her daughter�s carelessness, but the old woman shrugged it off with a bemused chuckle.

Still somewhat mystified, Miranda watched the old woman closely as she made slow but steady progress toward the old wooden bridge. Idly, and for no particular reason, she wondered if the woman knew the owner of the locket.

Someone Got Here By Searching For: Hilary Duff giving Aaron Carter head PICTURES And: Celine Dion anti american I�m Watching: An Affair to Remember. Ooh, I Heard That Was Good! Was It Good? Uh�okay, I will watch it. Tonight. I swear!

A Year Ago, I Said:

"Then he drove me back to my apartment, which was also nice. I guess it would have been pretty funny if he'd just been like, "Okay, bye," and left me standing there on the Promenade, but he's a gentleman."
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
2-7-2003

� 2005 by Dr. No, all rights reserved; you break it, you buy it.



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my last adventure: Part One: Anne

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