Lately I�ve gotten much more into CSI than ever I was in the past. This actually kind of bothers me, and not just because I�ve started having really freaky dreams about trying to solve crimes committed by celebrities (although that�s plenty disturbing in itself, if only because I should really not be dreaming about Demi Moore in any capacity), but also because, let�s face it, CSI is a Grown-Up Show.
How fondly I remember the days when I was the WB�s whore! All those shows about attractive twentysomethings going through teen angst were really my cup of tea. Even the bad ones. Even Roswell. But now I�m watching all these Grown-Up Shows like CSI and Cold Case and�you know, other stuff -- I don�t have time to name everything, but I�m, like, a cardigan away from becoming a CBS devotee! I can see it all now: I�ll be sitting there in my rocking chair, a quilt draped over my lap to fend off any chill that might sneak into the balmy, Los Angeles evening air, sipping my Ovaltine, and wondering what�s with kids these days, why can�t I program my VCR, and whatever happened to that cute actress who used to be on that show? You know�that show. The one with the girl? The girl who was cute? I wonder what happened to her.
That�ll be kind of sad, if only because I never thought that girl was that cute to begin with. I�ll be watching reruns of Murder, She Wrote and trying to change the channel with my cell phone and doing all sorts of things that would ordinarily have me committed, and all because I couldn�t stop watching CSI. I�ll say this, though; that show is quite educational. I�ve learned a lot from watching CSI! Like, for example, I�ve learned to never take a job cleaning hotel rooms in Las Vegas.
Like, seriously. Can you think of a worse job? Even on your best days, you know you�re going to open some door, minding your own business, trying to do your job, and invariably you�re going to walk into a room soaked in one or any combination of assorted bodily fluids. I mean, every single day! It�s not like this happens, oh, sometimes, or like, occasionally. People do freaky-ass things in Vegas, and if your job is to clean hotel rooms, you�re going to be putting your rubber-gloved hands all up in the thick of it. No pun intended.
And, you know, I�m not that good when it comes to dealing with bodily fluids in absentia of their host. When I�m out walking and I see a logy someone hocked on the ground, right in the middle of the sidewalk where everyone can see, my stomach does a little somersault and I step way, way out of its path. You don�t know what could be swimming in there! It�s terribly unsanitary, plus which, who wants a big wad of mucus festering on their sidewalk? You can imagine how I would be if my job were to clean up after lusty couples spending a few nights in Sin City.
And okay, I�ll admit I�m a little neurotic when it comes to germs and stuff, but that just makes sense. However, I�m going to be completely honest and let you know that if I ever walked into a hotel room I was supposed to clean and found a body�? Hell no. I wouldn�t even stop moving; I�d just walk straight to the window and jump out, because I would have lost every last piece of my mind. Can you imagine? I�d be like, �Uh-oh.� And then I�d sit down and stare for a moment before I started laughing hysterically. Then I�d start crying hysterically. And then I�d jump out the window.
So, yeah. Thanks, but if I�m going to get a job in Vegas that involves coming into contact with bodily fluids on a regular basis, I�d rather just be a whore, and cut out the middle man. Really, it�s just about being practical.
Someone Got Here By Searching For: orbitz commercial girl And: she wrestled I�m Watching: The season premiere of CSI, no surprise. The Point of This Entry Was: Okay, this isn�t an easy answer. I was actually planning to write about something entirely different, and then I got completely sidetracked. Maybe tomorrow I�ll tell the story I had intended for today.