� Memoirs of an Evil Genius �
Conquering the World, One Martini at a Time

� This Looks Like a Job For...Someone Else. �
12:33 a.m., 2003-11-05

And I�m back. Don�t everybody jump at once!

Anyway, it�s been a long and crazy week (or so), and now that it�s all behind me, I can honestly say that I had the time of my life. Well, to this point, at any rate. I mean, I�m still pretty young and as great as this past week was, I really hope that I might have at least a few things to look forward to that will be better than this. It would suck for my life experience to peak in the first quarter.

But the fact remains that, after this assignment I completed as of last night (save for a few adjunct follow-up assignments for the same project in the near future), I�m finally sure of what I want to do with my life. And it ain�t being an account representative.

Almost unfortunately, for the first time in the last three months or so, I finally don�t feel like I�m about to get axed by Sophie. I was worried at first, because when I had to call and beg off work a week ago Monday at the last minute, I was sure she wouldn�t want me to come back. Agent Orange, however, left me a message sometime on Friday, telling me Sophie had requested my return to Arts-Friendly Non-Profit on this past Monday. The big mark in the �con� column for that was the fact that my other gig didn�t end until Tuesday.

When I sauntered into A-F N-P (which, I should mention, I only recently discovered is not a non-profit as it had originally been represented to me, but rather is a for-profit organization that does good things for non-profits. I feel so dirty and used) this morning, though, Sophie was all happy and excited, and Sam informed me that Sophie has absolutely no plan to get rid of me. In fact, she wondered if I would be taking my Mondays off from this day forward.

I wish I could have said yes, seeing as how my head was totally not in the game all day long. I would just sit there, staring at my computer screen, and suddenly feeling like I was in this great big cage in the zoo; the exhibit starts promptly every morning at 8:30, feeding time is at noon, and the Research team gives me little puzzles to figure out so they can test my reflexes and intelligence. My scores were not terribly high today, suffice it to say.

Looking back, my other gig was really poorly organized, the pay was little more than a handshake, and I may have become psychologically scarred for life after walking in on two of my co-workers as they explored the fascinating world of oral sex in the break room. Every. Single. Day. At lunch. I mean, eventually I obviously learned to avoid the fucking break room at lunch (and frankly, all other times), but you�d think that those two might sort of pick up on the same basic idea at some point. Not so.

But anyway, despite all of this and more, this has been an amazing experience, and quite an education. Here�s hoping it happens again soon.

Someone Got Here By Searching For: �look at the sweat on his� And: �Lisa Loeb� new glasses I�m Watching: Alias. I�m a little behind on my TV. I�m Craving: Right now? A blintz. Is that weird?

� 2005 by Dr. No, all rights reserved; you break it, you buy it.



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