Hey, y�all! A bunch of nerdy scientists with no social lives have discovered a new planet! (In another solar system!) They gave it a charming name, too: OGLE-2005-BLG-390Lb. I think that�s Greek.
Anyway, from Jessica and Catherine, I stumbled across this site, wherein you upload a photo of yourself and some technological wizardry spits back your top ten celebrity lookalike matches. Sounds fascinating, no? Sounds kind of...superfluous, right? I mean, if you want to know who you look like, if anyone, can�t you just ask someone? Dr. Goodhead and I like to play the Tell Me Who I Look Like, Only Don�t Say ____, Because I Hear That All The Time game. For me, ____ is Crazy Tom Cruise. And seriously, if I never hear that again? I�ll be a happy man. Because he crazy.
In any event, despite all of the uncommon lookalike names she threw my way�names she was pretty sure I would never have heard, because I only looked like them in certain light, or from a certain angle, or blah blah blah�only one of the matches this online program gave me have I ever heard before from a flesh and blood human. That name...I will tell you later. Because, oh, the humanity. (A hint: it was NOT ____, but still someone I would not entrust to watch my children.) But then, that was one name out of thirty-seven. I mean, I put in four photos of myself (each one taken from a different angle) to see how consistent this thing would be, and only THREE of the names on the four lists overlapped. Without further ado, please let me tell you what I discovered about myself.
To begin with, each photo produced a different �number one match�. Apparently the four celebrities that the different views of my face most resemble are Grace Kelly, Shirley Temple, Shania Twain, and Carlos Santana. So that should give those of you who don�t know me a pretty good idea of what I look like. And, okay, I�ve heard that I have �feminine eyes�? But I am a dude. Why are twenty of my thirty-seven matches all chicks? Coincidentally, all three of the overlapping names are chicks, too, Grace Kelly being one of them. And don�t get me wrong�Grace Kelly is GORGEOUS. But she�s a chick. Oh well. Like I always say, it�s better for people to say you look like a gorgeous chick, rather than Michael Palin. Whom I also apparently look like (albeit only slightly�number eight on the first list). He is NOT gorgeous. From my first list of matches, I�d never heard of the other two dudes. One of them is Zinedne Zidane, which...I don�t even know what that means. That sounds like a villain from Charmed.
My number two from the first list�right after Grace Kelly, mind you�was Emma Watson. She�s no Shirley Temple, though, and I would know. I also apparently look like Enya, Andie MacDowell, Kirsten Dunst (another of the overlapping names, although I hope my boobs aren�t as saggy as hers), Mae West (!), and Winona Ryder. My second picture was evidently more masculine (sorry, Shirley Temple), as it compared me to Alec Baldwin, Frank Sinatra, and David Beckham. I really wouldn�t mind looking like David Beckham, actually. Of course it ALSO said I looked like Courtney Love, so you can go to HELL, Lookalike Generator.
My third photo, while looking the most like Shania Twain, also looked like Shirley MacLaine (and, judging from the picture they provided, not the YOUNG Shirley Mac, either), Billy Corgan (and I would say WTF about this, but he is the one I�ve heard before in real life), Cate Blanchett, Sandra Bullock, Celine Dion (which I guess is fine as long as I don�t SING like her), Penelope Cruz, and the dastardly Avril Livigne. It also said I looked like Andy Roddick, though, and that�s another I�ll gladly accept and print on my business cards.
My last picture, while bringing back the old familiar names of Grace Kelly, Kirsten Dunst, and Winona Ryder, also looked like Ewan MacGregor, Tom Hanks, Katharine Hepburn, Audrey Tautou, Jackson Browne (for reals?), and Alyson Hannigan. I believe we�ve all noted the eerie similarities between Tom Hanks and Katharine Hepburn! And I also believe that this experiment just countered everything you�ve ever heard about computers being �smart�.
Someone Got Here By Searching For: tattoo-friendly job (or perhaps they meant �Tautou�-friendly? Wokka wokka!) I�m Watching: 24, still. How much tension was I not filled with when dippy Audrey was debriefing relationship-of-convenience Diane? So much tension! I�m Reading: These days, it seriously takes me two hours to go through my email and read my roster of blogs and other online things, and that�s about all I got time for.