I have to apologize up front for the fact that I really don�t have anything to talk about today, really. I mulled over the various things that have happened to me over the course of the past few days, but none of them really stood out as any one topic ripe for the journaling. So instead of just forgoing the update for today, as any reasonable person might, I�m going to do what I�ve always done in situations like this: I�m going to pick a topic at random and just start babbling! Like so.
I realized all of a sudden yesterday that I�d forgotten about my niece. I don�t mean in general, but in the context of my Christmas shopping, which was almost completely finished. I thought I only had one gift left to buy before I could kick back and relax for the next few months, and then I realized that when I was making out my gift chart (don�t look at me like that�my family is noted for poor planning, as evidenced by the fact that eight of us have birthdays within a two-month radius of Christmas) I accidentally left her name off. Consequently, I didn�t factor her into my Christmas budget, and�well, now we know why Santa checks that list twice.
All is not lost, however! I still have nearly a month and a half before the big day. Which, if I know me, means I�ll probably just scramble for two weeks, trying desperately to come up with some awesome gift so that I can be The Really Cool Uncle, and then just give up in a panic and buy her a sweater or something. Not that a sweater isn�t a good gift, but�clothes are notoriously difficult, because it�s hard to pinpoint a person�s exact taste, and besides, who wants practical gifts for the Holidays?
My theory regarding practical gifts is this: if it�s something I can�t live without, unless it�s really, really expensive (like a gold toilet) I�ll eventually be buying it anyway out of necessity. I�d rather be gifted with luxury items that I want but can�t bring myself to spend the money on, like a boyfriend or a vacation to France. (If any of you are thinking to surprise me for the Holidays, you may write those two items down.) Of course, as much as I�d like to give my niece a boyfriend or a vacation, let�s be honest, I�m more likely to find a gold toilet in my price range (it would have to be small, and dangling from a charm bracelet, but nobody specified the toilet had to be functional�loopholes are my friend).
At any rate, I am ashamed of myself for not having already come up with something brilliant. My niece started college this past fall (I�m a very young uncle, living in Hollywood, no less�all the more reason I feel pressured to be Cool), and is now at a pivotal time in her life when there is a host of things she might want and need! Sadly, all I can remember desiring from my college days were privacy and food. And a boyfriend. Clearly, I can�t exactly give her privacy (and we�ve covered the boyfriend thing), which leaves the option of comestibles. But that brings its own pitfalls. Like, I could put together some big and amazing care package for her, but then it�s still like, �Merry Christmas! It�s�Doritos.� Not Cool.
When I went away to school, my mom took me shopping for things she knew I�d need, and things she knew I�d need but wouldn�t know I needed until I needed them and didn�t have them, and thusly wouldn�t have bought them for myself, like a laundry basket. I�m embarrassed to admit that it would be completely within character for me to forget a laundry basket and end up carrying all of my clothes up and down the stairs in a huge ball every other weekend or so, looking like Atlas, leaving a trail of socks and underwear in my wake. But again, who wants to get a laundry basket for Christmas?
So you see my dilemma. Obviously, the simple answer would be for me to just ask my sister what my niece wants, and I have to talk to her anyway to find out what her husband wants as well, but I have learned the hard way that you can�t put all your eggs in that basket. If you wait to come up with a brilliant gift until someone closer to the giftee in question gives you an idea, you end up buying sixteen different kinds of hot sauce and looking like a jackass (true story). I don�t want to look like a jackass, you guys.
Anyway, if you guys have any great suggestions, lay �em on me! And look�I hardly rambled at all!
Someone Got Here By Searching For: getting over your lesbian ex-girlfriend I�m Watching: Lost. I know that we�re supposed to identify with the characters more after learning their backstories, but�I still hate Sawyer. A lot. Is that wrong? My New Drink Is: A soy latt� from Starbucks. Sigh. Just when I thought I was out, the �Bucks pulls me back in.