� Memoirs of an Evil Genius �
Conquering the World, One Martini at a Time

� The Devil Wears Pasta �
4:00 p.m., 2006-07-05

Look who�s updating! Finally. I know it�s been a while � I don�t have much of an excuse, except to say that last week was my last week at work, and there were a lot of loose ends to tie up, which kept me from my journal. And anyway, it is so FUCKING hot out, that I think I have a little free pass, right?

Seriously. So. Hot. And there�s no air conditioning in this apartment! It�s a gorgeous apartment, with all hardwood floors and shit, but it just SUCKS heat in like a convection oven. It�s hotter inside the apartment than out, and that�s with all the windows wide-ass open and the fan blowing. It�s so hot my trail mix is melting in its bag. So hot that even our roaches don�t want to scurry. They just kind of listlessly scooch along on the floor, knowing that I�m too grossed out to stomp on them, and too lethargic to trap them and flush them to their watery grave. Hell, I�m about to flush MYSELF to a watery grave, just because maybe it�ll be cool down there.

We had a pretty low-key Fourth, over here. I mean, aside from the heat making excitement sort of an insurmountable task, we were pretty much barbecued out by the time Tuesday rolled around. So we spent the afternoon traipsing around The Grove, searching unsuccessfully for a pair of shorts for me (my collection has dwindled slowly to two, and now one of them is literally falling apart at the seams, and the other is [which I am wearing right now] accented with a festive smattering of bleach stains from the time I used Lysol on the commode and the spray bottle leaked on my leg). We also drank champagne (surreptitiously) while watching The Devil Wears Prada with Domino and company.

I was a little conflicted about the movie. I�ve never read the book, having heard all kinds of negative things about it (bad and self-indulgent writing, a dearth of sympathetic characters, and blatant self-aggrandizement), and the people I know who had already seen the movie said essentially that Meryl Streep is her typical awesome self, but that the other characters are thinly drawn and unsympathetic. Having now seen it for myself, I can say that I partially agree. Andy�s friends were shallow and unsympathetic, little more than gestures to demonstrate how much Andy Doesn�t Fit In At Runway (�Look! Her friends are ethnic and artsy and brainy! What�s she doing at a fashion magazine?�) and later, to punctuate the point that The Job Has Changed Andy. Her boyfriend was a whiny little crybaby, and I was never happier than when they broke up.

Andy herself? Didn�t bug me. Admittedly this is because I saw her living huge parts of my life from when I worked at Arts-Friendly (tremendously stressful job, difficult boss, great position in an industry that wasn�t exactly my milieu, and a refusal to give up until...well, until I realized it was killing my soul and I had to get out), and I felt for her. She didn�t always handle it with grace, but then neither did I. And I didn�t feel like there was an overwhelming intellectual snobbery to the film either, and that Andy grew to at least appreciate the world she�d entered, even if she didn�t totally understand it. It was more a character study of her and Anna Wintour�s Miranda Priestley�s relationship, and I thought the actors portrayed that very well.

But okay, enough of the Gene and Roger. Today I�m working on a menu for dinner tomorrow. We invited Dr. Goodhead to dine with us, and now I have to figure out what I�m going to serve. It�s challenging, because I have to come up with something that is summer appropriate (ie, light and seasonal) and doesn�t require too much cooking. (Because, as I mentioned, our apartment traps heat like a tiger pit and won�t let it go.) I�m thinking of serving a broiled whitefish in a vermouth reduction, with blanched asparagus, a chanterelle tart, and fresh lemon custard for dessert.

Food is my fashion, I suppose.

This Week�s Trivia Fact: The four Shakespearean plays that feature ghosts are Hamlet, Macbeth, Richard III, and Julius Caesar. I�m Watching: Well, I watched The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency marathon last night, and then dreamed about crazy models and some kind of strange scavenger hunt involving riddles written on the wall of my bedroom. Maybe too much TV for me. I�m Reading: I�m now reading a book on art theory, although I�m only about two pages in. Where I�ll likely stay for the rest of my life. Good thing I�m leaving town on Sunday and will have two plane flights to catch up on my reading!

A Year Ago, I Said:

This past Friday, I went and saw this weird-ass Australian movie about aliens and the living dead, and there was a scene where a toothless drifter punched out a zombie fish when it tried to eat his face, and I offer this up just to show that I don�t need alcohol to make questionable choices.

TKO (Tequila Knock Out)

7-5-2005

� 2005 by Dr. No, all rights reserved; you break it, you buy it.



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